Thank you again for being a part of this project. Let's get this party started!As you know, the title of the book project you will be contributing to is Talking White: 14 Ways to Cope with Thoughtless Remarks. The title of the book is meant to be provocative enough to get people to pick it up...read it...consider the book's point of view...and then learn.
It is being written for several reasons, but the two most important are that (1) young developing children that are being bullied or singled out for proper use and enunciation of English (or any other language) need a way to cope; and (2) the people that are using these thoughtless remarks need to see how it affects and has affected both children and adults so that they will stop. The book will show kids that other people have had the same experience; and that there are some ways to cope. I don't pretend to have all of the answers, but I've got a few.
I hope you have had an opportunity to read the preface to the book - My Life as an Oreo. It seems that we have all had similar experiences and I venture to say there are tens of thousands (maybe more) of children and adults out there with the similar stories. This book (including the unwritten Introduction) is not about me. And that is why I put together this online focus group: to get ideas, motivation and quotes. It takes a village.
For the next four weeks, I will pose 4 to 6 questions per week that will require your response. I only ask that you respond to a minimum of 4 as I realize people are busy with their lives. Of course, all 6 would be great. Your honest, candid, thoughtful, emotional and often vulnerable remarks will be a valuable contribution to this project that you can be proud of. (Honesty is critical.) Your personal information (name, address, etc.) will NEVER be used. I will ask you privately for your permission to use your name in the book if necessary.
The only rules of the room are that you remain understanding, polite, and respectful. No product or service plugs. (I have already had to delete one Follower...heavy sigh.)
Since this is a gathering, I think introductions are necessary, don't you? =) Kindly respond to the following vital statistics and questions...and let's get this party started!
- Age Range: 19 or under; 20-30; 31-40; 41-50; 51-60; Over 61
- Male or Female
- Occupation
- Cultural background
- City, State and Country you currently live in
- City, State and Country you were born/raised in
- Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)?
- Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter?
- Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when?
- When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"?
- Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background?
- Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect?
- Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =)
Until next time...
I am an African-American female freelance writer in my mid-20s from Chicago, IL. The product of a black mother from Mississippi and a Nigerian father, I was reared in Chicago and relocated to the deep South when my mom retired from her job and wanted to spend her leisure years where she grew up. While I was in Chicago, I attended a predominantly white grammar school (first through eighth grade) and a culturally mixed high school. When I moved to Mississippi the middle of my freshman year of high school, I transferred to an almost equal representation of blacks and whites, which was the same in undergraduate school. It was in high school where I encountered the term "talking White" for the first time. Upon graduation from undergrad, I knew I had to leave the South. As much as I enjoyed discovering a new way of life and connecting with friends and family, I could not dwell in a place where remnants of racism were still so blatant. To this day, I still hear that term and I cringe from irritation. Last year, a fellow grad student told me I needed to "get out of the lily white ass neighborhoods" of the North side of Chicago to spend some time in her South side neighborhood and hangout spots. The other day, my cousin told me "the sista was finally coming out in me". So, it has been my experience I have heard those words from peers and family (which were other black people). I don't ever recall telling anyone that he or she "spoke White" because I knew how ignorant it sounded and remembered how peeved I was when those words were thrown in my direction.
ReplyDeleteHere are my answers to the questions :)
ReplyDelete1. Age Range: 19 or under; 20-30; 31-40; 41-50; 51-60; Over 61
19 or under (I turn 19 in two months).
2. Male or Female
Female.
3. Occupation
I just finished high school and am going to study Cultural Anthropology in Amsterdam.
4. Cultural background
My forefathers/great-grandparents are Indian, but my parents and grandparents are born and raised in Surinam, a small country in South-America. I am 100 % Indian but live in the Netherlands. I have been raised with the Indian, Surinam and Dutch culture.
5. City, State and Country you currently live in
The Netherlands.
6. City, State and Country you were born/raised in
The Netherlands.
7. Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)?
Yes, all of my schools until now: elementary school and high school both had a huge white student population.
8. Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter?
I often get comments about me being able to speak proper/good Dutch. This is a "positive" comment, but sometimes it has been said in mean context (for example that the other person had never expected (someone like) me to speak like that). I have been called names and treated "different" but that was more because I am brown, so that was more racially meant.
9. Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when?
I don't quite remember very well, but I think it must have been when I was about eight years old and I "surprised" people with my ability to speak Dutch and act just like them.
10. When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"?
A couple of weeks a go (I think it was in April), someone said he would have never thought I was South-American if he had not met me (in real life).
11. Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background?
It mostly are co-workers, strangers or people I know from school (that I wouldn't exactly call friends). They mostly are white themselves, and "compliment" me on me "talking white" but I do have some Surinam (South-American) friends or people I know that have said I can act really white, but those are not the people who usually tell me I act white.
12. Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect?
No. I speak very "decent" Dutch.
13. Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =)
I have sometimes said about people that they are a "bounty" (you know, the chocolates?): brown from the outside and white form the inside, and when I say that I mean those people act like white people and are forgetting their cultural heritage. So they look Indian, but they act as if they are white. I admit that it is not a good thing of me to say such a thing, but I guess that sometimes I really feel that way and I should somehow try to stop myself making those comments... (I don't mean to make an excuse for those comments I have made, though.) I have however, never described myself as a "bounty".
1. 20-30
ReplyDelete2. Female
3. Certified Pharmacy Technician
4. African American and Native American
5. Mentor, Ohio USA
6. Ashtabula, Ohio USA
7. Yes, from K-12.
8. White girl
9. Yes, it was in the third grade.
10. Two days ago
11. Family, friends, and strangers. They are all the same cultural/ethnic background as myself.
12. no
13. No. My feelings were hurt when I was referred to as acting/talking white. Even though I still don't understand what acting/talking white means.
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ReplyDelete1. 31-40
ReplyDelete2. Female
3. Homemaker
4. African American
5. Atlanta, GA
6. Pine Bluff, AR
7. No. Prior to Undergrad, my school's populations were balanced. My classroom settings were majority White, as I took advanced curriculum and was in the Gifted program throughout K-12.
8. "Oreo"; bourgeosie; uppity; "think you're too good/better than us"; White girl. From White people - "you speak so well"
9. In Middle School
10. Last week. My daughters - yesterday.
11. Family, strangers, "friends", usually of same background.
12. I have no accent.
13. I have never used that term towards another.
1. 20-30
ReplyDelete2.Female
3.customer service rep
4.African American
5. GSO, NC
6.Same
7. k-12
8. I've been called a sell out, a wigger, and several other choice names I'd rather not say.
9. I was in Middle School and I was talking to a group of friends and one of my "friends" said it to me because of the way I was talking and referencing certain things.
10. Probably, last week.... Its norm now I've heard it so long its ridiculous.
11. Friends, Clients, and Family. Different backgrounds.
12. No. not that I'm aware of.
13. Yes.
1. 20-30
ReplyDelete2. Female
3. Admissions Rep
4. African American
5. Atlanta, GA
6. Passaic, NJ
7. Yes, middle school and high school (8-12)
8. I took a linguistics class in college and after learning about ebonics debate in California, one of my classmates asked me "how come you don't talk the ebonic language-- isn't that your native tongue?"
9. I was in middle school and it was a huge transition for me to start going to a predominately white middle school b/c I grew up in a very suburban African-American neighborhood. When I would come home after school, my neighborhood friends would tease me about my newfound speech.
10. Its been a while... probably the last time was when I was in college.
11. Its a combo of friends and family, but sometimes strangers. Yes, they are from the same cultural background.
12. I don't think so... If so, its barely noticeable, but I was raised in the South.
13. No
1. I am 36.
ReplyDelete2. I am female.
3. I work as a cashier/customer serv rep
4. I am the product of two black parents.
5. I was raised in Lansing, MI and still reside there.
7. From K-3, and 10-12, I attended predominately white Christian schools. The other grades I attended culturally/racially diverse schools.
8. I get called 'Becky' quite often. And when I WAS married, my husband would tell people that he was in an interracial marriage. (He was/is a black man born/bred in the Bronx.)
9. When I was 5 I remember my mother telling me that my grandfather had asked, 'Why does she talk like a lil white girl?'... I was almost 3 when he made that comment. (Always wondered why she would bother to tell me that?)
10. Last week in an IM.. I responded to a friend,'COOL BEANS!'.. and he told me, 'That is so white.'
11. Family says it, co-workers say that I sound more 'white' then they do. Men I have dated have said it, men I wouldn't date have said it....
12. I don't have a dialect.
13. I have not ever used the phrase.... I haven't figured out what it means yet... perhaps, once I do..... Nah, I doubt it.
MoniqueCB
ReplyDelete1. Age Range: 19 or under; 20-30; 31-40; 41-50; 51-60; Over 61
19 or under (I turn 19 in two months). I am in the 41 - 5- range.
2. Female.
3. I am Client Manager for a large health insurer and just completed my Masters In Org Leadership this May .
4. African American
5. I live in Stone Mountain, GA USA.
6. I was born and raised in the Bronx, New York USA, Holla.
7. For elementary middle and high school I had the good fortune of attending schools that were equally mixed racially and culturally.
8. Besides the subject matter of speaking white I was also accused of expecting too much for myself when applying for a different positon in the first health care company I worked for. I should be happy with the god job I had of answering phones and should not want or expect to do more than that other than possibly pay claims. Amazing.
Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when. The first time I can really remember with any real understanding is in my example I sent whole working part time during high school and college at my local Pizza Hut. This was said to me by my fellow co workers, of course other minority women.
10. I have not been told to my face that I act white in a very long time.
11.Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background? When I was told it was been by a co worker who at the time I considered a friend. I was young so forgive me.
12. Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect? I have a distinct New York accent.
13. Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =)
No, I have not because this saying never made any sense to me, what does that mean? I knew kids from all races and cultures and they all tended to run the gamut. Some were smart, some were dumb, some were capable and others not so I knew enough good and bad in all to not categorize. Acting white did not always symbolize to me something that needed to be idolized.
I am 35 and female. I am in the job hunt but currently I am a cafe manager. My background is African American and I was born in and still live in Milwaukee, Wi. All of my schooling has been in predominitly white schools. I have been asked if I am from another country because of the way I speak. I have also been asked if one of my parents is white. I can't remember the first time I was accused of "talking white". The last time was a few weeks ago. It was not verbal however. I had an in person interview after a phone interview. When I walked in, the interviewers eyes got so big and she actualy stammered a bit. When she said me name it was not a statement, but a question. I have never used that phrase. I just can't wrap my brain around it.
ReplyDeleteKimberlyAC
Age 43
ReplyDeleteFemale
Buyer at a research university
Black
Cleveland, Ohio USA
Born in Cleveland; lived in Pittsburgh Pa for a few years, then back to Cleveland.
Attended predominately white schools grades 3 through 8; racially diverse high school; mostly white school for undergrad and now grad school.
Other than being told that I "acted white", I remember being told that my family thought we were better than other black people. My mother was a single parent and she often took me to the art museum, to hear the orchestra and to the many ethnic festivals in the city. People refused to believe that we actually enjoyed these things, and some school kids would say loud enough for me to hear, "she's one of those uppity niggers". I only heard these comments from other black people.
I don't remember the first time I was told I "talked white", but I remember it started to happen when my second grade teacher commented (in front of the class) that I spoke very well. Some kids in class spoke up and said, "that's because she's trying to be white". I did go home that day with a lingering question regarding the teacher's comment..."I speak very well for a what"?
The last time someone came out and used those exact words was when I was still in high school. I was raised in a diverse family, and exposed to different books, music and cultures. Kids in high school used to call me "white girl", because one day I might show up wearing a Rolling Stones or Pink Floyd t-shirt and reading something by Audre Lorde, and another day I would be rocking a Parliament Funkadelic t-shirt and reading Shakespeare. I tend to get more subtle comments now like, "you are the only black person I know who likes this or that, or does this or that, or makes their kids do this or that". Incidently, both of my daughters were called "white girl" by their black peers in junior high school.
These comments are usually thrown at me by other parents at my kids' school, some family members and a few associates along the way...they were all black.
I don't have an accent or dialect.
I have never used the phrase talking/acting white.
AndreaLL
Here are my answers...
ReplyDelete1. I am 39yrs. -- Yikes!
2. Female
3. Middle school teacher (8th gd. U.S. History)
4. Mexican American
5. I live in San Ysidro, CA (near San Diego)
6. I grew up in the Central Valley of CA in a small town -- Visalia
7. From k thru college and grad school all predom. white
8. I've been called white girl, school girl, "you think you're better than us", stuck up, wannabe
9. The first time that I remember being told that I'm acting white was in the 9th grade. In high school I began taking college prep courses while my neighborhood friends were either in remedial classes or going to the continuation high school. They first began teasing me about that. Funny because I was the only Mexican in the college prep classes and they teased me that I had an accent. I didn't even speak Spanish at the time!
10. Now I get told that I talk like an "Americana". These are from my husbands relatives that live in Tijuana. They laugh at my Spanish accent because it was my 2nd language.
11. See above. But also, now my children attend a private school that has many children of wealthy families from Tijuana. So now I get "the look" of disapproval from the moms at school when they talk to me in Spanish and I have to ask them to slow down or switch to English. The looks are like "oooh, you're one of those"
12. I have no accent, yet like I said above I got teased by white classmates for "talking Mexican" while my Mexican friends said that I was too white.
13. I don't think I've ever used that phrase to describe someone else.
Age Range: 31-40
ReplyDeleteFemale
Occupation: Military Officer
Cultural background:
City, State and Country you currently live in: Kapolei, Hawaii, USA
City, State and Country you were born/raised in: Gordo, Alabama, USA
Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)? All
Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter? "Olive Oil", "White Girl"
Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when? Elementary School
When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"? Last week
Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background?
Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect? Southern California
Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =) No
Sorry..I forgot cultural background. I was born in Alabama so I consider myself Alabamian American. My heritage consists of African, Irish/Scottish/English, German, and Italian. Culturally, I am eclectic in that I celebrate the heritages of my family but also through intense travels, I have adopted other cultural nuances that I have fallen for. I speak/read Italian, French, and Haitian Creole.
ReplyDeleteI also forgot to answer: Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background? This has ALWAYS been "black" people.
Age Range: 19 or under; 20-30; 31-40; 41-50; 51-60; Over 61
ReplyDelete20-30
Male or Female
Female
Occupation
Executive Assistant for Nonprofit CEO and political campaigner/ Consultant
Cultural background
African/ Black American
City, State and Country you currently live in
Washington, DC
City, State and Country you were born/raised in
Military Brat- Across the globe.
Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)?
I went to 9 different schools before my 10th grade year. Most schools were majority white. 10th-12th was high population of white and hispanic americans.
Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter?
Well, because of my name many people thought of me as an Oreo. I had the name of a black girl but spoke as though I was something else.
I have gotten comments from both races, black and white. White people would say they were more Black than I. People would purposely "hood" up my name.. Mar-Qwe-ita. Bronqwesha.
Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when?
When I first moved back to the US when I was 14 I would told I spoke like a white girl. I couldn't use the same phrases many of fellow students were using because I said them incorrectly. In some cases I was an outcast from the Black population because for some reason they thought I could not relate.
When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"?
I have not called or told I was White since college, which has been a little while. I grown my relaxed hair out because I was tired of people assuming I was a "white girl" because I had straight hair, freckles, and "spoke white".
I have had the wonderful opportunity of meet a group of people with the same experience in DC I never have the problem of someone describing me as " talking white".
Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background?
I have gotten it from both sides, Black and White, and usually from someone who just meets me, whether it at work or though friends. My family, not in my immediate family, sometimes feel as though it is okay to say that to me. I still get comments like "bousgie", "uppity", and others.
Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect?
No, I do not.
Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =)
No. I only have one comment I make about others is that they are 'confused'. I'm referring to black people who try to say they are not black but indian, and white, and some other culture.
I am a black woman and its clear by looking at me that I am not directly from the shores of Ghana. I am of many cultures, thats what makes me American. Its condescending and insulting to hear people act as though they are more white or something other than black. Its okay to claim many cultures but 'Confused' people see being black or more black than any other cultures as a bad thing.
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ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteAge Range: 41-50
ReplyDeleteFemale
Former public relations hack/journalist turned Freelance writer (on disability at the moment)
Multicultural girl who self-identifies as African-American
Lives in: Drain, Oregon, United States
Born/raised in: San Diego, California, United States
Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)?
YES. High school - it was along the Pacific Ocean, a surfer school.
Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter?
It seemed to indicate that I thought I was too good for others, blacks and Latinos. That wasn't everyone's perception of course but it tended to be the wanna-be badasses who would utter these things. As a kid in elementary school in the early '70s, I had been called an Oreo. Ugh.
Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when?
I guess that would be in elementary school again, which when I started attending was mostly white but by the third grade, was becoming more mixed as white flight started to happen in my neighborhood.
When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"?
I live in Oregon in a rural town so this is also a predominantly white state. But I have heard it said here in the last 5 years that I have lived in this state. Probably does not help that my current husband is a white southerner also.
Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background?
Mostly black folks and sometimes family to tease me but my husband says it to me to tease me as well since he has a Southerner accent and says I have a "Valley girl" one.
Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect? See above.
Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone (including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =)
I have said that about someone but not their face and usually in jest.
1. Age Range: 31-40
ReplyDelete2. Female
3. Occupation: I am a Program Officer (meaningless philanthropic term) in a foundation that also does policy, advocacy, and research work. My area is Education & Youth Development.
4. Cultural background: African-American with Cajun Louisiana roots
5. City, State and Country you currently live in: Los Angeles, California, USA
6. City, State and Country you were born/raised in: Los Angeles, California, USA
7. Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)?: 5th grade, and college.
8. Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter?: “White girl.” “Why do you talk white/like a white girl?” “Why you gotta talk all proper?”
9. Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when? 6th grade – recess.
10. When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"? Probably high school (thankfully).
11. Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background? I remember it being my friends in school – all the same cultural/ethnic background of me. More recently, I don’t get “talk/act White”…I get comments that I’m articulate, or, when I lived in Louisiana for a time, “Where are you from?” [because I didn’t sound like them].
12. Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect? I don’t think most (North American) folks would say so…but I use plenty of SoCal slang.
13. Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =). Nope.
JenniferAA
Age Range: 19 or under; 20-30; 31-40; 41-50; 51-60; Over 61- Age 40
ReplyDeleteMale or Female - Female
Occupation - Buyer/Planner
Cultural background - African-American
City, State and Country you currently live in - Houston, Texas
City, State and Country you were born/raised in - Brooklyn, NY
Did you go to any schools with a predominately White student population? If so, what grade(s)? 5th Grade - Pasadena, Texas
Other than being told "you talk White" or "you act White," what are some of the negative comments (including name calling) that you have experienced relative to this subject matter? "Oh you think you are white", "Why do you talk like "that"?, "Your parents must be white".
Do you remember the first time someone told you that "you talk/act White"? If so, when? When I moved to Houston, Texas (middle school), I had a hard time understanding the southern girls and they had a hard time understanding me.
When was the last time someone said you "talk/act White"? It's been a while, I just notice that other women of color, where I work, tend not be bothered with me. Maybe it's because I where I wear my hair natural as well..... lol
Who usually tells you that you "talk/act White"? Is it friends, family, co-workers, strangers? Are they usually from the same cultural/ethnic background? My sister tells me all the time, that I come from white parents. Others don't comment but when I sing songs from other stations other than RnB, I can tell they want to say something. Or when I'm verbal, I see the look on faces...... hmmmmmmmm
Do you have a regional or cultural accent or dialect? Not really but my father is from Trinidad
Have you ever used the phrase "someone is talking/acting White" to describe someone(including yourself)? It's okay if you have. =) No, because I don't think there is such a thing as "talking white".
I am a 53 year old black woman who teaches English and Latin. Being black, with the predicted "racial" admixture of anyone whose family has been in North America for more than 4 or 5 generations, sums up my cultural identity. I live in Redwood City, CA., but despite being here in S.F. or on the peninsula for over 25 yrs., people still ask me if I'm from the east coast. Guilty: family from Baltimore and New York. I attended predominantly white schools from the fifth grade through post-grad education.
ReplyDeleteWhen I see the question about negative comments and name-calling, the first thing that I remember is being called the n word by a family of mouth breathers whose dilapidated dwelling I had to pass on my walks home from my elementary school. In school, I had a small measure of difficulty with a "gang" of tough girls. The leader was a strikingly pretty girl who, I realized later, probably thought that being mean and aggressive was a way to protect herself from sexual predation. "Sididdy, white-talking, think she something cuz her mama is a teacher," was the soundtrack for their weekly, follow-her-home-and-try-to-kick-her-a** gang practicum.
I can't leave the question without pointing out that I have been called "articulate" (with the surprise, awe and wonder only white people summon when they say it), much more than I've heard abuse from anyone of any color about "talking white."
"Why you talk like that?" I heard first in the fifth grade. This, in the bathroom, in response to my response to her first question, "Hey, do your hair take water?" I had no idea what that meant, and as I turned away from the sink to face her and her two friends, I replied, "Sorry? I'm not sure what you mean."
"Humph," she muttered to her friends as they moved toward the door. "She mus' think she white or sumthin."
I'm often asked if I'm from the east because I'll pronounce word like "daughter" with an eastern brogue.
I have never even thought that someone "talked white", much less said it.
I am a 53 year old black woman who teaches English and Latin. Being black, with the predicted "racial" admixture of anyone whose family has been in North America for more than 4 or 5 generations, sums up my cultural identity. I live in Redwood City, CA., but despite being here in S.F. or on the peninsula for over 25 yrs., people still ask me if I'm from the east coast. Guilty: family from Baltimore and New York. I attended predominantly white schools from the fifth grade through post-grad education.
ReplyDeleteWhen I see the question about negative comments and name-calling, the first thing that I remember is being called the n word by a family of mouth breathers whose dilapidated dwelling I had to pass on my walks home from my elementary school. In school, I had a small measure of difficulty with a "gang" of tough girls. The leader was a strikingly pretty girl who, I realized later, probably thought that being mean and aggressive was a way to protect herself from sexual predation. "Sididdy, white-talking, think she something cuz her mama is a teacher," was the soundtrack for their weekly, follow-her-home-and-try-to-kick-her-a** gang practicum.
I can't leave the question without pointing out that I have been called "articulate" (with the surprise, awe and wonder only white people summon when they say it), much more than I've heard abuse from anyone of any color about "talking white."
"Why you talk like that?" I heard first in the fifth grade. This, in the bathroom, in response to my response to her first question, "Hey, do your hair take water?" I had no idea what that meant, and as I turned away from the sink to face her and her two friends, I replied, "Sorry? I'm not sure what you mean."
"Humph," she muttered to her friends as they moved toward the door. "She mus' think she white or sumthin."
I'm often asked if I'm from the east because I'll pronounce word like "daughter" with an eastern brogue.
I have never even thought that someone "talked white", much less said it.
ok I have been responding to this blog and completely forgot this entry. I started from the top down. silly rabbit... Here it goes:
ReplyDelete1) I am 36 years old
2) Female
3) I am a software training & content developer
4) Pura Mexicana
5) Currently live in Las Vegas, NV
6) Born in San Jose, CA and raised in Santa Clara, CA
7) All of my schools have been pre-dominantly white (grade school thru college)
8) I was called "Coconut" and "ice cream sandwich" because I was brown on the outside and white on the inside. I was called this at different times in my life by family and acquiantances. People have always been surprised that I "do not have a noticable accent" I didn't know I was supposed to have one.
9) I was in elementary school and tried to introduce myself to a kid who was new to my 3 grade class. He was nice to me till he found out my last name. Then he said he wasn't allowed to talk to me because I was a dirty mexican kid even tho I don't look or sound like one. Then he asked me why am I trying to be american.....I will never forget that.....
10) Last time someone referred to me as "talking white" was when I was hosting a virtual training class with sales reps from the US and one of the reps sent me a side note complimenting me on my pronounciation of his polish last name. He said most "southwesterners" don't pronounce it very well. When I asked him to explain what a southwesterner was (he was from Connecticut) he proceeded to explain that it was someone from the southwestern united states with an accent that makes it difficult to pronouce the "ski" in his name. He asked if I was raised on the east coast because I didn't sound mexican. sigh.....
11) my cousins from LA used to ask me if I am done with white guys so I stop being white and start being mexican. Gotta love familia...
12) I sound like a californian - whatever that accent is I guess.
13) I grew up hating being labeled as white by my own gente. So I was never one to tell someone else how they sounded "white". Now when I was graduating from high school we (my friends and I) gave my friend a hard time because she went to Harvard and we told her she was going to start sounding all "professor like" - could that be construed as "talking white?" Who knows.
I am a 20-30 year old female of African-American culture. Currently, I live in Zanesville, Ohio; however, I was born in Florence, South Carolina both of which are located in the United States of America.
ReplyDeleteFor most my formal educational years (pre-K to sixth grade; ninth to twelfth; and college (undergraduate & graduate), I attended schools with a predominately White student population.
Oreo, Banana, Red, Wanna Be White, and House Ni*%er were the names my classmates (and strangers) used to call me. Due to my height (5'11 since sixth grade), I was unable to wear the current trends (i.e. any time of skirt and/or shorts from the kids/junior section)--Therefore, I would wear fashions (or lack there of) from the "grown folks" or misses section. In which cases I was teased and told I was a snob because instead of getting to wear "trendy" stuff--button downs, slacks, and rarely jeans (they were either high waters or didn't fit properly in the waist) that met my mom's standards (she was an elementary principal and didn't really care for athletic wear...the much desired sweats top & bottoms I LOOONNNGGGEEEDDD for) were my typical school attire.
Summer of 2008, shortly after my wedding--a family member stated that when she calls our home--sometimes she could not tell if it was me or a white person answering our telephone.
Mainly associates (who think they are my friends), strangers, and yes the occasional family member. Typically, they are from the same cultural/ethnic background. Most of my friends/associates and even strangers from a different background ask inquisitive questions regarding my hair.
It depends, while I do not have a regional or cultural accent/dialect (thanks to public speaking class and participating in theatre)--when I'm either extremely tired and/or have been around some of my extended family in South Carolina/Georgia areas---my "southern slang" with the accent will slip:-)
Since neither my parents nor grandparents have a heavy accent and were/are very articulate...I always thought speaking "proper English" was the only way. It was not until my junior high school year's that my classmates introduced me to Ebonics and told me "about myself" (i.e. I talked white).