Monday, July 6, 2009

Chapter 9: Thank Your Parents

Another coping mechanism is to Thank Your Parent(s). In the book, on of the exercises will be for children to write a thank you note to their parent(s) thanking them for ____________.

Please write a Thank You note to your parents.

I realize that we have MANY things to thank our parents for, but when writing, please remember to stay focused on the topic of "talking/acting White."

12 comments:

  1. Dear Mom & Dad,

    I just wanted to thank you for guiding me in the path of education, which settles for nothing less than the best.

    Dad, I thank you for introducing Mom to a different way of life and a new area of the city, which opened so many doors for Adiat and I. It allowed me to further my education with a Master's degree in Journalism and exposed us to a rainbow of cultures I appreciate everyday. Although you left when I was very young, that imprint remains in my life to this day.

    Mom. thank you for always being there to encourage me and support me in my endeavors (including education), but especially when I needed the reassurance it was more than okay to be me (proper English and all). Thank you for allowing me to correct your grammar as you spoke to me. It was never meant to be an insult, but a reinforcement of what I learned and passing it on to others.

    I hope I've made you proud.

    Love you always,
    Iya

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  2. Dear Mom and Dad,
    Thank you for teaching me that different doesn't mean bad. Because you celebrated me as a person, I gained strength to be myself even though some people said I talked white or acted white. Thank you for supporting my dreams and helping me reach goals that were labeled as white by others. You showed me that hard work, perseverance, and prayer goes a long way and that nothing can stop God's plan for us.

    Love,
    Miriam

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  3. Dear Mom & Dad,

    Thank you for encouraging my to explore different things, even when you did not understand them yourselves. Thank you for leading by example. You always let me know that knowledge was not for white people only. Speaking up in class and getting good grades was what I was supposed to do. When I was bullied or teased you always stood in my corner. Whether it was a serious or humorous lesson you always let me know that being part of the crowd is not always the best thing. Thank you for letting me be me.

    Love,
    Kimberly

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  4. Dear Mom & Dad,

    I want to thank you for raising me and teaching me to experience, understand, accept and move on. Thank you for letting me and the boys become the unique individuals we are. You both taught us how to face any challenge, obstacle and person with respect, dignity and humility. You always taught us to look at the brighter side of any dark cloud. When I was teased for my eye - you taught me how to wear my patch with pride. When I couldn't climb a mountain - you showed me how to stick to rocks, when I was teased for my "whiteness" and for being a coconut, you taught me that my culture and pride is what I carry inside and I can express it anyway I please. Both of you faced many obstacles in your worlds with culture and prejudice. It was your courage, humility and humor that taught me that I am me and no one can make me feel bad if I didn't want them to.

    Thank you for showing me strength to face the world when the world didn't want to look at me or hear me. I am a better person for it.

    I love you and thank you,
    Christina

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  5. Dear Mom and Dad,

    Thank you for teaching me how to be confident, strong, and graceful. From an early age, you encouraged me to take advantage of opportunities where I could deliver speeches and act in various plays. The moments when I was able to speak in front of a crowd helped me to be able to feel proud and passionate about the way that I communicated with others. I was eager to make friends and impress my teachers growing up. I wanted to be the smart kid in class and I was never afraid to raise my hand.

    You taught me how to take risks, be bold, and stay true to myself. Mom, you were the ultimate example of how a lady should carry herself with class, poise, and grace. You taught me how to develop and maintain positive self-esteem. When people bothered me in school, you constantly reminded me that I am beautiful and smart and no one could take that away from me. Thank you for teaching me how to love myself no matter what. No matter what people say or regardless of how they treat you. I am who I am because of your incredible guidance and support.

    Dad, you are my rock. You taught me how to be a fighter. How to knock people out with my intelligence and how to become an articulate, well-versed young lady. I wanted to walk a mile in your mockasins and I did my best to do so. I always admired you for your courage and your leadership, particularly with our family. You have the zeal and the personality to attract people and can start a conversation with anyone. You then impress them with the depth of your knowledge and the range of your vocabulary. When we did not know the meaning of a word that you used, you always made us look it up. Thank you for doing that. I know have an extensive vocabulary and I'm an avid reader, so I truly appreciate you for that.

    To the both of you, I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude and appreciation for being incredible role models, loving parents, and my best friends. Thank you once again!

    Sincerely yours,

    Shana

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  6. Dear Mom,

    I want to thank you for keeping me on the right course. When I wanted so much to be like my friends from the neighborhood, you guided me (sometimes forcefully) to make new friends. You wouldn't let me dress like them and always corrected my grammar.

    Back then it was HARD to be different from everyone I knew. I was embarrassed to be the "school girl". But I know why you did it. You wanted something different for me.

    When the smart white kids made comments to me in the honors classes, you told me "try harder then...beat their grades then see what they say". I hated that answer! But when I did it, you were right.

    Even though it was hard, I kept going because of you. Now, I can say that that B.A., M.A. and Teaching Credential isn't just mine, it's ours.

    Thank you for everything. I love you

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  9. Dear Mommie:

    Thank you.
    Two simple words that I don't believe I say enough to you. I am so thankful that God saw fit to bless me with you as a mother who's ultimately become my best friend. You have always instilled in me to utilize the tools and knowledge to find my purpose in life. While you never told me who to be, you demonstrate how a true queen should carry herself. The lessons you taught were often unspoken--how to walk in a room and demand respect without having to say a word, how to be quick to hear and slow to speak (yeah, I'm still working on this one), and most importantly to ALWAYS be a lady (pearls or not).

    Thank you.
    For always knowing what to say when I cried my eyes out when I was teased. You helped me understand that being unique was a beautiful and I should not compromise my integrity for anyone nor anything. You did this while still recognizing and respecting my feelings at that time.

    Thank you.
    For telling me “perfect practice=perfect.” Encouraging me to always strive for excellence and settle for nothing less. Challenging me to research things that I did not know (Webster and I were best buds) for empowerment. Teaching me that the sky is the limit and education is the road map. Forever modeling the role of how a lady is to speak with love (and have a command of the English language) and to act with grace at all times. Even though I was taunted about these things (and more)--you helped me live through it and for that I am truly grateful.

    Thank you for being the example and helping me to be okay with defining my own path.

    Much Love Always,

    ~me:-)

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  10. Wow, this is something that I have thought of often, especially after my Mom passed a few years ago.There are a number of things I would love to thank my parents for but the one I will speak to is the idea of their unconditional love. This includes the discipline I received. I always knew even when I was in trouble that my parents loved me. I always felt that I was the light of their eye. I knew they loved me enough to want the best for me and if that included discipline at a certain time that was a part of love. What that did for me was allow me to understand that I was loved at home and did not have to find love in some boy in the streets. This kept me out of a lot of trouble when I was younger and allowed me to follow and fulfill my dreams and not have them interrupted prematurely. I remember reading once that Maya Angelou said that children need to see your eyes light up when the enter the room, I may have paraphrased a bit. My Mothers eyes always lite up when I entered the room and I make sure that I do the same for my children.

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  11. Mom,

    Thank you for making education such a priority in my life for as long as I can remember. You created in me a love for learning and especially reading that I still carry with me now, and have passed on to my children. Thank you for giving me courage to continue to be myself when the kids in our neigborhood called me "bookworm", or "whitegirl". I'm a parent now, so I know when I told you the things the other kids were saying, it had to break your heart. You said, "people can be cruel, and if you let what folks say to you and about you get down inside of you, you won't stand a chance in this life child". In your very matter-of-fact way of saying things, you would simply tell me to stay away from the kids who said mean things, and play with the nicer kids. Back then I thought you didn't understand, and that it was more complicated than that. Well, it was me who didn't understand....it is just that simple.

    Thank you for every paper you made me re-write, every book report or current event article you assigned outside of school work. I truly thought you were deranged when you assigned me extra reading and writing exercises. You told me that you always felt like you were less in the company of educated and successful people, and you were determined that I would not be made to feel that way. Mom...you need not feel intimidated in the company of anyone. In fact, I'm sure there are some things the executives and politicians of this country could learn from you.

    You were a single parent, and I remember all the evenings you came home late from working in that factory. I could see how tired you were, but you would sit and check every page of my homework, and go over any corrections that needed to be done. It wasn't until years later that I realized that not every mom was doing this.

    Thanks to your support and encouragement, I have confidence in my intelligence, and my abilities. I have the comfort to move and mingle with anyone from the coat room to the penthouse.

    I love you mom,
    ~Lynn

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  12. Dear Mom,
    When I was in the 6th grade and first began to be called “white girl,” and that I talked like a white girl, I was desperate to fit in and to end the teasing. I didn’t talk like the other kids, who were just as educated as I was, but they used lots more slang, and seemed to have different cadences. I decided that I was going to speak with a southern accent so I could better say words like “ain’t,” and “fittin’ to,” etc. Because I was a fairly dramatic kid with a big imagination, you ignored my weird speech for about a week until one day, driving me home from school, you finally demanded to know what in the world I was doing. I explained to you my grand plan – and you got incredibly upset. More mad than I had ever seen you when I hadn’t done something super-wrong. You told to never try to speak slang on purpose, and to never try to speak incorrectly for any reason. And for the rest of my life you corrected my speech and usage anytime you heard something off. I’ve never forgotten the lecture in the car that day, and how upset you were. It has sustained me decades later and is a lesson I hope to pass on to children and youth I care about. THANK YOU!

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